From the very first look at the bag, I was scared. They looked dangerously similar to the blueberry Twisties—the ones that stained my tongue last time.

Now, full disclosure: I am biased. I don’t usually like products that look like they’ve been dreamed up by unicorns on a sugar high. I do enjoy the kawaii aesthetic, sure, but if a snack tries too hard to be this cute, it usually means the taste won’t back it up. But here’s the thing… I was happy to be proven wrong.

And wrong I was. Eating these Twisties was honestly a pleasant surprise. As soon as you open the bag, it smells like pure sugar, and when you pull one out, the bright pink colouring instantly makes you think, “Oh no, this is going to be bad.” Each piece is coated in sugar, but when you actually bite into one—shockingly—they’re actually edible, and so much better than the cursed blueberry version. They tasted less like a Twistie and more like crunchy fairy floss. They have a tangy sugary taste, and the remains of the twistie really get stuck in your teeth long after you have eaten one, so make sure you are ready to be tasting sugary fairy floss for the next hour. Or just have some floss on standby to floss it away. That’s a lot of floss. 

My first thought was that the kids would absolutely love these. Parents, on the other hand, would probably have a heart attack watching the sugar rush kick in. Personally, I couldn’t eat too many. They had my heart rate spiking like a Brexit tackle, practically flooring me with the sugar overload.

And that’s the problem. I don’t hate sugar, but I don’t like it either—it’s too good and too bad for you at the same time. These Twisties are dangerous. Dangerous, tasty, but still deeply wrong. I’d rather just eat fairy floss or just a Twistie. Combining the two feels like breaking some sort of natural law.

So please, Twisties… just stick to cheese.

Rating: 2.3/5 

Try them if you dare.